The holidays. For some, they’re a magical time of year filled with joy, connection, and celebration. For others, they can feel like a heavy burden, a season to get through rather than embrace.
For most of my life, I’ve found the holidays magical—after all, any excuse for twinkle lights is a win in my book! But there have been seasons when the sparkle dimmed: the loss of my mom in mid-December, relationships that didn’t turn out as I’d hoped, and other challenges that made the holidays bittersweet.
I want you to know that wherever you find yourself this holiday season, your feelings are valid. If you’re grieving or struggling, your sadness does not diminish someone else’s joy. And if you’re brimming with happiness, that doesn’t invalidate someone else’s pain. Both can coexist—not just in the world around you, but even within you.
You might deeply enjoy the season’s festivities while also missing someone dear. Or perhaps you’re navigating grief yet still smiling at twinkle lights or enjoying a favorite holiday movie. That duality is a natural part of being human.
Life’s work isn’t about always being at the top of the positivity scale; it’s about recognizing where you are and allowing yourself to feel while gently moving toward a better place when you’re ready. Maybe today, you’re at 51% and leaning toward joy, or perhaps you’re at 40% and taking small steps to move forward. Wherever you are, it’s okay. Feel what you need to feel, and when you’re ready, take that next step toward a better-feeling thought.
Moving forward, I encourage you to face the holidays by:
Honoring Your Feelings. Be aware of how you feel in the moment and honor it without judgment. If you need quiet solitude, embrace it. If you crave connection, seek out activities that light you up. Your emotions can guide you toward what you need.
Celebrating in Your Way. Holidays don’t have to look one way to be meaningful. Maybe you cover every inch of your home in twinkle lights, host parties, and sing carols. Or maybe your holiday tradition is a single candle, a cozy blanket, and a favorite book. Celebrate in ways that feel authentic and comforting to you.
Practicing Gratitude. Gratitude is a powerful anchor no matter where you are emotionally. If you’re struggling, it can help you shift toward a better space, one thought at a time. And if you’re already feeling joyful, gratitude will amplify your happiness. Look for small things—a warm drink, a kind word, or the sparkle of holiday lights—and let them remind you of life’s goodness.
Connecting with Others. Whether surrounded by loved ones or celebrating solo, connection is key. A heartfelt conversation, a quick text, or even a shared smile with a stranger can bring warmth and joy to the season.
The holidays are as unique as the people who celebrate them. Whether you’re celebrating big wins, navigating loss, or experiencing a mix of both, embrace the season in ways that honor you. There’s no right or wrong way to do the holidays—only your way. Wherever you find yourself on the positivity scale, you’re not alone. The twinkle lights shine for all of us.
Affirmation:
I honor my emotions and celebrate the holidays in ways that feel meaningful to me.
Words to Love By:
The joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives. – Russell M. Nelson
To appreciate the beauty of a snowflake, it is necessary to stand out in the cold. – Aristotle
Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more. – Melody Beattie
