Who Are You?


I am a big baseball fan for those who don’t know me well. Specifically, I am a St. Louis Cardinal fan. I’m excited that the season is back on after months of the owners locking the players out. I follow a Facebook page for Cardinal fans, and while I LOVE it, it also reminds me of something that we seem to have let go of – common courtesy. Fans in the group call the players names and each other names in the comments. While I know this isn’t new and not just Cardinal fans doing this; I wanted to take a moment and address it and ask:


Who do you want to be, and how do you want to show up in the world?


Now, before I go deeper into that question, I believe that most people feel ‘safe’ to say those things about others online and wouldn’t consider saying it in person, yet they still say it. People don’t like a political party, religion, or anything that differs from them; rather than disagreeing, it’s name-calling. Or, the person I am calling names has done justifiably harmful things, so it’s okay for me to be mean.


Who do you want to be, and how do you want to show up in the world?


Do you want to add to the cruelty in the world and your own life with your thoughts, words, and actions, or do you want to be part of creating the world you want to live in with kinder thoughts, words, and actions?


Disagree and disapprove all you want with unkind actions AND choose not to stoop to that level of blame, shame, and complaint. Rise above it, holding people accountable and seeking LOVING and kind solutions.

Who do you want to be, and how do you want to show up in the world?

I ask myself this question daily, especially when fear creeps in and I want to lash out. I know who I want to be and how to show up in this beautiful and messy world.

  • I want to be a positive changemaker.
  • I want to stand up for those who can’t stand up from a place of firm LOVE and kindness.
  • I want to be an example of LOVE, especially when it’s easier to come from fear.
  • I want to help people see that kindness is their superpower.
  • I want people to be happier when I enter the room rather than leaving it.
  • I want to hug as many people worldwide as possible and let them know they are seen and matter.

If I want all of these things, it requires me to be them.

  • If I want a more LOVING, kinder, compassionate, and peaceful world, it requires me to be more LOVING, kinder, compassionate, and peaceful in my world. To emulate them in my thoughts, words, and actions.

I, too, get triggered by the cruelty and injustice in the world. I too get frustrated about personal challenges in my world. I feel my feels and go back to my question.

Who do I want to be, and how do I want to show up in the world?

I don’t get it right all the time, but because I’ve made LOVE, kindness, compassion, and peace a daily practice, I get it right the majority of the time.  I choose daily to move forward, being reminded the way to heal cruelty and injustice is through LOVING, kind, compassionate, and peaceful solutions.

Who do you want to be in this beautiful and messy world?

Moving forward, I invite you to ask yourself that question and begin your journey of being that, especially in the challenging moments by:


Making a list of what you value, as knowing your values will help you make clearer decisions on how you want to show up in the world. You can download my value exercise to get started.


Make a list of what the world you want to live in looks like. Get clear on what kind of world you want to live in. As you know, I’m not an absolutist, but I do believe the VAST majority of us want to live in a peaceful world, where there are plenty of resources for everyone, and our families are safe and secure. Get crystal clear on what that looks like to you. Knowing what the world you want to live in looks like will help you stay focused on creating it rather than stepping into the fear of your current situation. Focus on LOVING solutions.


Ask yourself if your current thoughts, words, and actions are making the situation better or worse. Being angry isn’t the issue; it’s what you do with it. Harness your anger into positive action rather than staying in complaint mode.


Take a break and be gentle with yourself. Take a break when your life or the world challenges get too big for you to handle. Rest. Reboot. Be gentle with yourself. Fill yourself back up to face the challenges of this beautiful and messy world we live in. I recently listened to a Brene Brown podcast called Accessing Joy and Finding Connection in the Midst of Struggle, and I encourage you to take a listen.


Mostly, I want you to know just how powerful you are! Your thoughts matter. Your words matter. Your actions matter. YOU MATTER. Now let’s create the world we want to live in one positive thought, word, and action at a time.



I choose to be led by LOVE, kindness, compassion, and peace.


Words to LOVE by:

The goal is not to be better than the other man, but your previous self.
– The Dalai Lama


When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too. – Paulo Coelho


“Find out who you are and do it on purpose.” ― Dolly Parton


Sounds for Your Soul:

I Was Here – Beyonce

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